Holiday in Handcuffs
by SpiderLily
Summary: Dumbledore's latest House unity mission happens to include eight seventh years, a conversation with a matchmaker, and four pairs of handcuffs. Features slash, femslash, and het, with HPDM SLASH being the major pairing. Also including PPDG, TNHA, & JFFMB.
1. Presenting a United Front

**_Holiday In Handcuffs_  
**A Christmas Story Written by SpiderLily

* * *

**Chapter One: Presenting a United Front**

**

* * *

**December had just come to Hogwarts, and the castle was alight with holly and evergreen, tinsel and mistletoe, and the suits of armor had been decorated with poinsettias and Chris Cringle hats and been charmed to sing carols to those students who walked by. It was only the third day of the last month, and many wizarding versions of _Winter Wonderland_, _Silver Bells_, and _Deck the Halls_ could be heard around the corridors.

But something didn't feel right to one Albus Dumbledore. Gryffindor and Slytherin Houses at each other's throats more than ever, and now the Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs had been brought into the fray.

It had to stop, and the headmaster had just the idea with which to do it. All he would need was a bit of consultation with the Sorting Hat, readied (and selective) private rooms that were usually reserved for couples, and four pairs of magical handcuffs. . . .

Merry Christmas to all, and to all an extraordinarily eventful night.



"Are you sure about this, Albus?" the Sorting Hat croaked from its perch atop a bookshelf in the headmaster's circular office. "Two of these couples in particular will cause a ruckus among the entire school."

"Ah, and that's the beauty of it, my dear Hat," the headmaster muttered over his notes detailing the four couples.

"If you say so," the Hat murmured skeptically. "But I still don't think the method you have for the revelation of the handcuffs is going to go over well at all. . . ."



"I would like to thank everyone for attending this very special feast," Professor Dumbledore announced at his podium the very next Saturday, the day he would be announcing Holiday in Handcuffs. The students looked at him in boredom, clearly wondering why he was saying that since it was dinnertime, and everyone attended dinner.

"Tonight I would like to present the very first official United Front, an organization I invited to prevent House rivalries. The first challenge, which, if chosen, you will have to go through, is called Holiday in Handcuffs, and is designed to bring together two unlikely pairs in the seventh years. As I call out your names randomly, I wish everyone to come stand up here with me."

The Headmaster cleared his throat, and then declared, "Representing Gryffindor, Harry Potter and Parvati Patil!"

Harry blanched. _Damn_. And he was just hoping he was going to come out of this unscathed. So much for that thought.

"Representing Hufflepuff, Justin Finch-Fletchley and Hannah Abbott!"

"Representing Ravenclaw, Mandy Brocklehurst!"

Albus took a drink of pumpkin juice before announcing those representing Slytherin to add to the suspense, and it worked. The whole of the Slytherin seventh years were practically bristling.

"And representing Slytherin, may I have Draco Malfoy, Theodore Nott, and Daphne Greengrass!"

Oh, this was going to be so much fun!



As the two remaining seventh years walked up to the podium, there was a moment of tense silence throughout the Hall as everyone waited with bated breath for something—anything—to happen.

And happen it did.

Without any warning whatsoever, each of the students was pulled to another with some sort of invisible force. Shackles appeared from midair to wrap around wrists, and the eight students struggled desperately with their newfound restrictions.

From Dumbledore's point of view, it was very amusing. Harry and Draco were glaring at each other, but didn't seem as surprised as the other couples. Parvati and Daphne were eyeing each other with disgust and Hannah was glaring in repulsion at Theodore. Mandy had turned up her nose at Justin, who seemed to be blushing.

Albus' smile seemed to waver, but then it returned full force. There were certain prices that had to be paid to present a united front.


	2. Eight Different Reactions

**Holiday In Handcuffs  
**A Christmas Story Written by SpiderLily

* * *

**Chapter Two: Eight Different Reactions**

**

* * *

****Part I: Ladies, Not Maties**

There was no way that this could possibly be happening!

Yet it was, Mandy couldn't deny that.

And there was absolutely nothing she could do about it except wait for December twenty-sixth, if they were even freed by then. But the worst part was . . . Justin Finch-Fletchley. God, she could not stand that translucent Hufflepuff. He was sweet, yes, but too sweet—and loyal—an average Hufflepuff with average grades. Mandy was a kinky, sexy Ravenclaw with O's straight across the board!

Mandy groaned inaudibly before shuddering in disgust at the simpering creature handcuffed to her.

This could not be happening.



Hannah Clarise Abbott was not cut out for this! A Hufflepuff and a _Slytherin_? Buh-bye honor and hello Heaven! She would be dead in a matter of weeks! No, days! Everyone knew Slytherins had no aspect of nobility, and Theodore Nott had to be one of the worst. Sure, he was one of those bookworm types, but everyone knew he hated Hufflepuffs!

But Hannah had to admit, he was kinda cute, if you went for the skinny, sallow, dark-haired types.

Maybe she would get _something_ out of this. . . .



Daphne tried to flush without being obvious about it. _Great_. She had been outed to the entire school as a fucking lesbian and had her gay-girl crush revealed in a matter of minutes! She quickly put on her most disgusted face.

Daphne had known she had no sexual inclinations toward the opposite sex since she was fourteen and went to the Yule Ball with Blaise Zabini. She had immediately noticed Parvati Patil, resplendent and pretty in pink with a tight hold on Harry Potter's arm, who didn't look at all interested.

She had thought she might die when she could barely take her eyes off the beautiful Indian Gryffindor.

But Parvati would never look at Daphne. She was skinny with very little up top and straight blonde hair with a streak of black off to the side that Daphne thought made her look insane.

Maybe Parvati wouldn't make too much fun of her.

She was, after all, a Gryffindork.



At first, Parvati had been in shock. But the shock had quickly wore off and been replaced with revulsion. She had been shackled to a Slytherin, and a girl at that! There was nothing worse that could happen!

But as Dumbledore explained that the couples would be ensconced together in private rooms until after Christmas in the hopes that they would befriend each other, Parvati's hopes were dashed out the window.

Things had just gotten worse.

But—hey!—they were free from homework for a month!



**Part II: Boys with Toys**

Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God, oh, God. . . .

I'm officially freaking out now!

I can see my obituary already: Justin Finch-Fletchley was the eighteen-year-old son of Johnathan Finch and Margaretta Fletchley. He was sadly killed by a raging Ravenclaw named Mandy Brocklehurst, who later stated that she felt no regret for her actions.

But she was _so hot_.

Those long brunette curls and earth-shattering jade-colored eyes made his knees weak.

Wait. . . .

Was he being too obvious?



Theodore Nott was well-known in Slytherin House for being a bit . . . cranky. All the time.

And his reputation was well-earned.

His hobbies included pestering Gryffindor first years before hanging them from their ankles in front of the Great Hall, not wooing Hannah Abbott, of all people!

And yet that was what Dumbledore expected him to do!

Theodore wasn't stupid, and could catch the subtle hints the headmaster was throwing at the four couples. He kept blathering on about "friendship" and "House unity," but really he just wanted them to be shag-buddies.

Theodore let his eyes rove over the Hufflepuff. Hannah really wasn't that bad-looking. She had long, wavy blonde hair and slight curves hidden by voluminous robes.

Maybe it wouldn't be that bad.

As Hannah shifted slightly, he noticed her pale skin and baby-blue eyes.

Nope, not bad at all.



Draco tried to whimper inaudibly.

This _WAS NOT_ happening!

Draco groaned at the glares Harry was giving him.

Yes, he called his rival _Harry_. He couldn't help it! The Gryffindor was so small, and lately his mop of raven hair had had that just-been-shagged look instead of that just-got-out-of-bed look.

And his eyes. Oh, God, his _eyes_. Such a jewel-bright, emerald color shouldn't exist, and Draco had the experience to know that emeralds that bright _didn't_ exist.

But Harry's did, and they weren't even real emeralds!

Draco groaned again.

He was totally screwed.



Oh, _shit_.

This is not happening, this is not happening, this is not happening, this is not happening, this is _not happening_!

Harry groaned. This was definitely happening, if the glares he was getting from his Slytherin rival were any indication whatsoever of his feelings toward the Gryffindor.

Yes, Harry had a crush, but the only person he would ever admit it to was Hermione, who was currently caught in gales of laughter over at the Safety Zone, more commonly called the Gryffindor table.

_Shut up, Hermione!_

As if the girl had heard him, she glanced up to where he had been shackled to his enemy—_and smirked_!

_THIS WAS ALL HER IDEA!_


	3. Coping with Difficulties

**Holiday In Handcuffs  
**A Christmas Story Written by SpiderLily

* * *

**Chapter Three: Coping with Difficulties**

**

* * *

**They had been forced to suffer through dinner at the Professors table where everyone was able to simply look up and gawk at them. Three of the four couples had difficulties because they were both right-handed and one of them was unable to eat. Therefore, Harry used his adorableness to force Draco to feed him. The other two couples didn't have any luck with that tactic.

The fourth couple, which happened to be Mandy and Justin, would have had limited difficulties if the damn handcuffs hadn't decided to shackle Mandy's left hand. So whenever she moved her left hand in order to take a bite, Justin's right went with it. The amiable Hufflepuff had nearly strangled her. The two had eventually come up with a plan: Let Mandy take a bite, let Justin take a bite, repeat from step one.

As soon as the dessert disappeared from the tables, the four Heads of Houses walked up to the shackled couples.



Professor Flitwick bounced up to Justin and Mandy before saying in his squeaky voice, "It's time for me to show you where you will be staying, so if you will follow me. . . ."

The walk through the castle was a short one, as they only had to exit the entry hall and take one set of stairs down to the basements, where their new "common room" was hidden behind a painting of five French debutants at a garden party. When asked for the password, Flitwick simply replied, "Aue de perfume."

The painting opened and inside was a resplendent living area with gold and cream colored decorations and a fire roaring beneath a landscape of Hogwarts grounds some thousand years in the past. There were only two doors: one to the bedroom and the other to a bathroom, and it appeared that they would have to get used to seeing the other naked.

Oh, _great_.



Theodore and Hannah were led to a blank wall on the third floor that was nestled between a suit of armor decorated with tinsel and a bouquet of poinsettias resting on an end table.

Professor Sprout said the password ("Mulberry") and they entered to see a lavish room decorated in silver, black velvet, and very dark purple silks. Plush chairs, two desks, and a roaring fire completed the look while two doors stood off to the side. One featured a room with a four-poster, double-wide bed done in mahogany and varying shades of ivory (and mulberry, oddly enough). The other room held a claw-footed bath and a shower with a frosted window pane.

"Well, I wish you two the best of luck," Sprout said with a nervous smile as she left the two alone.

Theodore and Hannah shared a 'look' before trying to go to opposite ends of the room and promptly falling on their bums.



For seemingly the millionth time in her life, Parvati Patil wished her own Head of House was as biased as Greengrass's—for only then would Professor McGonagall take multiple points from Slytherin for Daphne's repeated glares and for simply breathing.

The Gryffindor Head was leading them down a corridor on the fifth floor which ended in one of the few never-moving staircases that only moved steadily up the wall before arriving at the sixth floor. It was at the door right by the top of the staircase that McGonagall stopped at before stating clearly, "Pumpkin juice."

The room they entered was decorated in pale orange, which actually managed to look tasteful (if not a bit Halloween-y) with the black furniture and silk that was draped over the window. Bowls of candy corn and popcorn balls completed the look, while lamps in the shape of carved pumpkins created an eerie glow.

(And it was just the girls' luck that the next morning they would discover the skeletons in the closet.)

"Well, goodbye, girls," McGonagall said with a tight-lipped smile. "Have fun."

Daphne snorted. _I'm sure we will._



It may have just been Harry's amazing luck that meant Snape was the one to lead him and Draco to their room—which, for the record, was ensconced deep within the maze that was the dungeons.

Sure, the room was great, adorned with nondescript walls painted an unassuming off-white, with black leather couches and blue and green throw pillows, a simply amazing blue throw blanket, and multi-colored drapes. The bedroom was an interesting mix of oak bedposts, black silk, and soft green linen.

But it was located in Slytherin territory, hidden behind an inconspicuous stone wall (and there were many stone walls), with an inconspicuous password ("Cherry pie"). So unless anyone walked by talking about cherry pie, they were safe—supposedly.

Harry collapsed on the bed, ignoring Draco's complaints after being pulled to the bed with him. He'd had a hard day and that whiny brat could just shut the hell up!

There was absolutely nothing that could make his current situation worse.

Nothing!


	4. Surprising Revelations

**Holiday In Handcuffs  
**A Christmas Story Written by SpiderLily

* * *

**Chapter Four: Surprising Revelations**

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* * *

**The twenty-fourth of December came quickly, yet none of the couples had made any progress according to Albus Dumbledore's "crystal ball." It showed each of the couples fighting, falling down, screaming at each other and random inanimate objects, and a multitude of other things.

Perhaps it was time for a bit of intervention. . . .



Mandy groaned, trying to rest her head on her hands but failing because of the _fucking handcuffs_! Thank God they got out of these things tomorrow; she wasn't sure how much longer she would be able to last—trying to play chess while practically holding hands was one thing, but showering together was a bit beyond her limits. She had seen too much of the guy already, and they weren't dating, or even shag-buddies!

Looking at the chessboard that had already been knocked over six times due to the shackles, she turned up her nose. There had to be something she could do to add excitement, fun, and orgasms to their confinement, and suddenly she knew just what to do.

"Hey, Justin?"

"Yeah?" the boy asked, eyeing her suspiciously.

"How do you feel about bondage, melted chocolate, and the popping of your cherry?"



Hannah tapped her fingers in a foreign rhythm along the threads of the rug in front of the fire on which she and Theodore were laying—innocently.

"Could you please stop?" the Slytherin asked pleadingly.

She tapped her fingers a few more times before losing her rhythm and closing them in a fist. "Sorry."

"It's okay, but it was beginning to get on my nerves."

Hannah cringed. "Sorry."

Five minutes later, the silence had become overpowering, towering over them like an angry giant, and Hannah had to break it.

"So . . . what do you want to do?"

Theodore smirked, looking at her hungrily, and Hannah gulped. "Well, since you asked nicely. . . ."

He leaned forward, and the clock on the wall nearby seemed to slow down, the ticks of seconds becoming farther and farther away as, finally, he was close enough to feel Hannah's breath on his lips, and then they were touching, rubbing together softly in a slow, never-ending dance.

But the need for oxygen soon became apparent, and Hannah breathed in deeply in an effort not to pant.

"So . . . can we do that again?"



Daphne and Parvati were sitting on a loveseat, listening to softly playing Christmas music, and it was quite nice. For a moment, Daphne could imagine they weren't handcuffed together, but then the Gryffindor moved to get more comfortable and the dream was lost after feeling the tug on the binding chains.

"Remember . . ." Oh, no, she'd been preparing to speak. Crap!

"Remember when I told you that this was going to be the worst Christmas of my life? The day you fell off the bed and pulled me down with you and I got that bruise on my thigh that still hasn't gone away?"

Daphne blushed. She definitely remembered that. It happened to be one of the best days of her life; the day she had had Parvati Patil's breasts pressed against her own. It had given her enough wet dreams to last the rest of her life.

"Yeah, I remember that."

Parvati inched closer and gently pressed her lips to the Slytherin's before pulling away.

"I think I changed my mind."



Harry had had enough! Draco was beside him (of course) on the couch, innocently reading a book entitled Side-Effects of Amortentia. He was sitting here, wanting to lose his virginity on Christmas Eve, and the guy he was interesting in was _reading a book_!

This could not be happening.

And yet it was.

Harry James Potter was going to end this madness!

His plan was simple:

A: Get rid of the book.

B: Kiss Draco.

Well, subtlety had obviously left the window long ago, and Harry had to do what a guy had to do to get a shag, okay?!?

Without giving any warning in advance to Draco (the boy who was so obviously engrossed inside his _book_), Harry picked up the book and threw it across the room, where it collided with a vase and sent it crashing to the floor (but neither of them noticed _that_).

"Wha—!"

Harry pulled Draco to him by the back of his neck before catching his lips in a brutal, searing kiss before pulling back sharply.

"_Well_?"

"Let's do that again!"

"Okay!"


	5. Aftermath

**Holiday In Handcuffs  
**A Christmas Story Written by SpiderLily

* * *

**Chapter Five: Aftermath**

**

* * *

**"It is with great pleasure . . . and shock . . . that I present to you the four couples we haven't seen since early December. As you all have undoubtedly heard, they have been ensconced in rooms with none other company than the other in the hopes of strengthening the weak ties between the four Houses. Now, I would like to announce the four happily, er, 'together' couples, and here they are now!"

With his speech done, Albus sat down at his place at the Professors table, quite proud of himself for his success in greatening House unity and, well, other things.

"I do hope you're proud of yourself, Albus," the Hat had muttered earlier that day after a consultation with the headmaster's "crystal ball."

Because, even though he had just announced their return to the now puzzled students who were looking around in confusion, he had a feeling the four couples would be too busy doing other things to show up for such a trivial event as the Christmas Feast.


End file.
